Heat Wave...

Alright, it is 12:16 am on Saturday morning.. why does this mean you ask?! This means I will be 20 in 23 hours. That's right. 20!
Oh no, panic attack!
Not really, surprisingly I'm ready to be 20, I'm ready to step into my big-girl shoes and take on the world. Well, not exactly ready, but I'm not FREAKING out like I was a week ago. I think because I know I have no control over it anymore, not like I did, but now I have come to grasp the idea of getting older and honestly... I'm alright with it.
So, my mother REFUSES to turn on or even fix our air conditioner so I am sitting in my bedroom, in the blistering heat with a fan blowing directly on my face. What a life!
So today, I got a haircut, a much needed haircut and as most of you know... it is short again. YAY!
I absolutely, positively HATE my hair long. And by long, I mean if I can put it into a ponytail... I lose my mind.
Its dramatic, but hey that's what I am... dramatic.
Notice the dramatic pauses and slight dramatizations using uppercase lettering?!
Anyhow, my hair is short again and I feel like a big-girl. Not a 16 year old who doesn't know what in the world to do with her hair..
Since my birthday is so soon, me and mama went shopping today. I got a new comforter set. FINALLY. And a bathing suit top THAT FITS! YES! Plus some cute clothes for work and school. Then we came back and watched a bunch of movies... Including Blind Side and Ben Button. I laid out in the sun too... good day!
Although this was a fun day... I think its bed time.
Look for more confessions... of a former delusional bridesmaid.

Summer Lovin...

Alright,
I am no longer a delusional bridesmaid. Sad day, but also happy because my lovely Christine Knasel is now Christine Webb! Amazing!
So, I may become the summer hobo, we shall see.
This summer is nuts, but a lot of fun.
Working 3 jobs, trying to find another one that pays and waiting till I turn 20! Ahh!
Well, although I am busy, I am throughly enjoying this summer, except the heat.
Looking forward to the big birthday and some more time with my AMAZING friends!
I am so blessed..

Stress..

Ok so here I am in the middle of Chelsea, MI at a gas station... luckily with wireless Internet, waiting for Silvia, my big blue van to be fixed.
Today, her brakes blew out.
$517.58 later... I'm waiting for the mechanic to finish so I can get on the road and see my favorite bride, what a day!
I started bright and early at 2 am, went to work, left at 12, got on the road by 1 and got halfway to Kalamazoo before Silvia bit the big one.
Wow, talk about stress. Now, I am completely out of cash, like completely. Thank goodness I have a job interview tomorrow. Pray that I get the job, I need the money and the experience.
Anyhow, my internship is going swell besides the no-pay stuff and WKAR is consuming my life.
UGH. Who needs this?
I'm super excited to see Christine tonight and to see her get married on FRIDAY, but I am so stressed out. This is nuts.
I think its time I realize my limit.
Maybe, WKAR is too much. I may have to talk to my boss soon.
But, we shall see.
I think I can last until the end of June.
Alright. So here is update... WXYZ is awesome! WKAR is stressful. Silvia is broken. Bernece is amazing and very well-traveled. And Katie... um, I'll get back to you when I can think straight.
Pray for me.
Alright, this is the last week I am a Delusional Bridesmaid, I am honestly going to miss it, but I love them so I am so happy for them :D
Yay!!
Ok, back to waiting...

Feels like Home to me...

Alright, I am officially home for the summer and as some of you know, I will be living a pretty crazy life for the next 18 weeks. Here is the plan for the next couple weeks, Sunday through Tuesday living with grandma so I can commute to Detroit for my internship with WXYZ! Tuesday through Thursday living with Mag or other random East Lansing/Flint folks so I can commute to WKAR until the end of June and then... Working at least 20 hours a week to fuel this whole thing. Phew, I'm tired just thinking about it and to be honest it stinks having to pack my bag on Monday night for the entire week, who knows what the week will bring? No one!
Anyhow, East Lansing didn't disappoint and gave me a fantastic last week! I got a secret friend, spent some amazing time with my staff and other good friends, shared AMAZING kisses with this cute fellow :D and got a 3.5 in all of my classes (hopefully.)
Seriously, awesome year! AWESOME!
Also, Christine's wedding is in 12 days! NUTS!
I'm excited for this crazy summer, hopefully I will get to relax and have some down time with friends, family and that cute fellow. We shall see.
Stay tuned!

It all comes to an end...

Alright, school is coming to a close, my residents are all moving out and I have finished my last assignment as a sophomore.
This year has been crazy! This year has been so good! I'm sad to see it go.
I have grown more this year than I think I ever have. Let's recap shall we?
I found and accepted Christ as my Lord and personal savior.
I became single for the first time in a year and a half.
I saw the Lord change and work in me.
I have made unbelievable friends that have guided me in faith, moved me with laughter and have been there to stop my tears.
Wow, seriously this year has been absolutely incredible and I am so thankful for it.
Although this year has changed my life, I am terrified for the next step.
I am now a junior, I will be 20 soon and I will be entering the workforce as a news intern for Channel 7-WXYZ in Detroit.
Talk about growth, Geez Louise!
I am scared about what is next, but I am ready for it.
God has worked in my heart and changed my spirit and I know that I won't lose that once I move back home. I know that I will have God in my life until I meet Him in heaven, so why am I terrified? I am letting my worry and anxiety take over for what I know is true. I know God has a plan for me and will never let me fall. I know God loves me and will never let go of my hand, so I need to give up those worries. Seriously.
Easier said than done right?
But I shall try, and I shall try to keep up with this blog over the summer as I go from a delusional bridesmaid to a former delusional bridesmaid.
Alright, look forward to more confessions.

What in the World...

Alright, I haven't been on in a while and to be honest I don't know why, I have really been distracted lately and I have been having a hard time focusing on anything, which isn't good because finals are coming up soon and procrastination and laziness just aren't the best qualities to have right now. I have even been slacking on reading my bible and journaling. I really have. I find that I do more things for people rather than God, which isn't a good thing.
I'm just in a selfish place and I don't know how to get out of it. I really care what others think instead of caring about what the Lord thinks and what is pleasing to Him, so I need to pray about it, I need you all to pray about it too.
I don't know what is going on, but I know that the Lord is faithful and he will get me through it.
Alright friends, homework time. Look forward to more confessions.

April Showers..

Alright, so today was Christine's final bridal shower and it was a work/reslife shower!
It was so much fun and made me feel so grown up because she is the first of my friends to get married and I am not used to this kind of stuff. It was so much fun! She was so excited for her gifts and the food was GREAT! And we played games!
What a great afternoon!
Props to Danielle!
So, rounds tonight yet again, and this has been a bad news bears week for rounds because I wrote up 2 of my favorite residents on Thursday because of alcohol and they weren't even drinking. And last night another room on my floor was written up for alcohol, which sucked! This week was a week for the record books, the worst week ever!
So although this week was not so fun and was incredibly draining, I am starting off on a new foot, trying to stay positive and declaring that next week will be AMAZING!
Last night, before the alcohol was a great start, because Christine and I had a girl's night! We got all dressed up and went to see RENT! IT WAS AWESOME!
AWESOME!
YAY!
I have no motivation to do any work, but that's OK sometimes. This week will be great! I can feel it!
Alright, look for more confessions.